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coz these
little wonders
still remain
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coz these
little wonders
still remain
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 yippediibub |
 she says hi
Farizah or Fa or Izah or whichever you prefer
17,I have funny and awesome quirks I love to think of myself as a superhero coz superheroes get the chance to save the day I blog coz I want to have something that reminds me of everything that I did,yesterday today tomorrow I have a diary for that,but I can't put shitloads of pictures in it It'll grow fatttttttttt But it's still my best friend This blog's just for my own use Btw I hate spiders And I’ll let you in on a secret; I love myself |
 Kawan-kawansArina Aiza Ayeshah Bai Dru Filzah Hanis&Ziyah Kakak MyeSarah Riqa Shikin Shiqa Syafiqah Shurz Tumbly |
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 Monday, January 23, 2012 @ 10:37 PM I can't just do this all the time. Honest. I sorely need a break. Really. I'll go crazy! Not literally. But yeah, insane. Maybe I just need a break from you. |
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Sunday, January 15, 2012 @ 12:12 AM Anyhoo. You know how it feels like when you worked hard to make a relationship the way you wanted it but it just won't go that way anyway? That's how I am feeling now. Then some people would say that it's just not meant to be. But how can it not? For me, this is one of the most important ones in my life, and it just had to be like that. It took me 18 years to finally know that it just can't be like that. Maybe there's some other more important factor(s) that I missed, that would make it better. And yet, here I am as stuck as ever.... I get jealous of others. When it seemed to be working so fine for them, like all the problems seem to melt with just a hug or conversation or kiss or words of kindness. There's no such thing like that for me. If there was, then it's initiated by me coz I'm the lovey dovey kind, and a day not doing that is a day wasted. So...how does this go for me? It seemed that the better (I say better, and not good/best) option would be to...just give and not receive. Yeah well, most people say that will give you happiness. It does really, I've felt it. But not with this. Coz it hurts just to think that it will not get any better. It really hurts. I am not trying to sound like some martyr or anything, but my life has never been like a normal teenager. Maybe it was because of the way I was brought up, maybe it was because of the way I think, or maybe it's just Fate. I believe it's fate that I was brought up to be who I am today and that this is exactly how I was supposed to think. Yepp, I do believe it. So maybe it is fate that I have never, ever been like any other typical teenager. I have never been in a relationship, and I never thought of going into one. I have never been in love with the opp sex (I thought I was). I did not go through the rebellious stage at the right stage. I did not go through the rebellious stage the right way. I never got the phone that I chose (or wanted, coz actually I just love my phone). There's a lot of things I never did. That may be due to the way I think, the way I was brought up. Or maybe, it's just Fate. Yepp, I believe it's Fate. So all I have to do not is just go through with this even if I know I will suffer a number of huge disappointments? Sure thing, I can do that. Question is, am I willing to do that? Labels: live life, love, Memories, you Up,up and away |
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Monday, January 2, 2012 @ 10:44 PM MCS
OH wait, I've got something else to post! Abt middle children. Look out for the italics MDS is an emotional scarring syndrome. Middle Children sydrome includes neglect, forgotten dates, and sometimes in bad cases forgetting they even exist. Middle children will sometimes... -misbehave to get attention -go with the flow -work as little as possible -be less parent-dependent then their siblings -become the 'loner' of the family, not participate in family events unless told to. -play the peacemaker -be more likely to go to a friend for advice than a parent -be very creative Middle children are known for ending up with the things that are too big for the baby in the family and too small for the oldest. it is a known fact the youngest and oldest are treated differently than the middle child for the oldest is the first child aka favorite and the smallest is the baby aka the last child known for getting whatever they desire because they are the "baby" SO WE GET THE BULK Just an interesting read I got. So true. I was really upset abt it, disappointed. Not being able to go to my parents for stuff much. I was never demanding, ok maybe once but I really wanted it. That was when...in pri3? But I didn't get it, coz I was told to share (yes, even when I actually fulfilled my part of the deal by getting straight Bands 1s). I didn't even get to use it coz the First Child won't let me. How good was life? Maybe that was why I used to be the favourite kid (no kidding i'm surprised myself), coz I don't ask for anything much really. I just made do with stuffs. So maybe in that sense, I was the easiest. Ah now it makes sense. Now I'm being difficult, so I'm out of the favouritism thingy? Great, nice. I don't mind actually. Really. Coz now thanks to that, I am yearning now more than ever to be independent. You're being difficultly confusing. "They won't love me so much if I wasn't so 'perfect'." Sad, isn't it? To have such thoughts run across your mind? |
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@ 10:41 PM How does it feel like to be hurt? It feels just like this Whoohoo right now my life is....at the bottom of the ferris wheel. But alhamdulillah, I've been coping well with things and now trying to change my view on...things. InsyaAllah, everything will change for the better.
Up,up and away
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